Childhood family Divorce

         



            What exactly is divorce? When two people get married, they're making a promise to stay together forever, and in most cases, start a family. But sometimes a marriage that starts out great can turn bad over time.No marriage is perfect, and most husbands and wives go through tough times. The world can be a difficult place, and there are all kinds of reasons why parents get mad at each other or start arguing. Most of the time, moms and dads find a way to work through the problem, and things get better. So if you hear shouting or sense tension, don't automatically assume that divorce is on the way. Though id tell myself so oblivious not knowing what exactly what was going on between both my parents. I assumed everything was going well that my family was normal like everyone else’s.  
            My parents were very young in love as I was told, my mother was eight teen when she gave birth to me. As a child being raised by young parents that where struggling to balance school,work and being a family came to be over well ming. Not having a clue what was truly going on between both my parents growing up it had come down to my scenes. They weren’t getting along always fighting every time id walk around the house trying to distract myself from all the yelling. Id remember my father leaving my mother and I alone at the house storming out that he no longer loved my mother. As my mother dropped on her knees crying, “Why is this happening to me!” Id go toward her an hung her saying, “Are you ok mommy.” She’d looked at me apologizing for having to see them fight, though I had nothing to say.
         All I’ve begun to understand is  If the arguments last a long time and your parents can't find a way to make things better, they might decide that getting a divorce is the best thing, or the only thing, to do. At some point, they'll have to tell you what's going on, and they'll talk to you about their plans to divorce. If this happens, you have to understand that things are serious. You can't pretend it's not going to happen, and you can't just wish it away. It all became a highly effective moment in my life having to understand this was all reality. As my first experience going to a counselor having to express my feelings and thought i was told  It's perfectly normal for you to want your parents to get back together. Many kids going though a divorce wish for this at some point. But when you cling to the hope that your parents will make up or get remarried, it can make things worse. Things usually go much better if you understand that your parent's decision to divorce is a permanent one. From there, you can move on and find ways to deal with your new life, instead of wishing for your old one back.
               Life was  tough at for myself, even when you're living with both of your parents. You might not want to have to face living with one parent, or dividing your time between two different households. It was difficult  for me to see this, but sometimes having one happy parent, or two parents who are separate but happy, is a lot better than having two completely miserable parents. Id feel at times the effects of my parents  divorce can change virtually every aspect of my  feelings including where a person lives, with whom they live with, their standard of living, their emotional happiness, their assets and liabilities, time spent with either of them , and so much more.
       I could remember the time when my counselor would read my a book about, how children will benefit greatly if you can help them find healthy ways to work through their feelings. How You can encourage them to make drawings or paintings of their family to help you cope with your inner self. In a way it became helpful to  express my feelings through drawings. Another way to get the divorce of my mind as Young child often work through their feelings was by interacting with other children. I was beginning to grow interest in picking up a book and reading every night to put myself to sleep. However, just getting  to open up  with my counselor  helped  move on in managing my feelings. Till this day Im able to see and understand what my parents were going threw though times I could bare seeing them fight in my presents. I truly love them equally they were young in love and not prepare for commitment and responsibilities. They were children them self’s still growing up trying to figure out the paths they wanted to fallow in the future.  
          My parents are still divorced till this day though for my exitance they’v grown to become friends. In a way of there friendship I feel at times there is that little spark between them both. What if they were to give each other that chance now that they have there lives together. Though i could keep wondering at times how our lives would be if it were to happen maybe things were meant to be this way. You can never predict the future,but I believe you can make things happen if you truly want to by taking that chance.